Category Archives: Journal Entry

Frequency Shift: a metaphysical exchange (part 2)

I’m learning to embrace the new. It’s not what we don’t do, but what we do that matters. Life is a great show, we came here to enjoy it. Nature is such a wonderful example of life on Earth and what is possible in our own lives. There is no self doubt coming from the birds I hear singing on my porch. There is only living and breathing. From now on, when someone asks what I’m doing, I’m going to answer, “I’m breathing,” because the more we think about our doubts, the more they multiply.

Thoughts are frozen actions, the heart has no fear until we think about making a mistake. It is a cycle which we begin in our minds and watch as it happens in reality. It’s as if our mind knows it messed up by thinking the negative thought in the first place. I must over come self doubt, even though a lot of it was programmed into me during my young life. I have to make friends with fear and overcome self doubt. Fear is not negative, it is normal. We have to chase it and become friends with it. We live in a flash, there is no time for fear because all we have is NOW.

How can we let go of who we think we are and see ourselves for the true self? When I think of myself, who do I see? Is that what others see? What is important: what I see or what you see? — Judgment — Do I have to win all the time? What is abundance? Abundance is when you realize that you are worth it. That’s what I am learning. “Be well and do good work” a Garrison Keeler quote. So to all of you I say: Be well and do good work.

Frequency Shift: a metaphysical exchange (part 1)

Change will not come if we wait for somebody else or some other time. You are the one you’ve been waiting for. You are the change that you seek and desire.

I feel I should share a piece of my thinking with everyone. Some people might think I’m a bit egotistic to think this way, but here goes. “We can never lose, and we can never win, because we are the trophy. We are the prize we are striving for every single day and night.” Now when you begin to think this though, remember there is something we often forget. Remember this: our job in this life is to become the best version of ourself. Now, how can you become the best version of you? Do you know what being in your “heart space” is about? I don’t know more than you, I am just another person trying to figure out this whole process of “waking and sleeping.” I am learning that we, as humans, are the original technology and in learning this I know I can change the reality of my surroundings. I realize that this sounds crazy to others, but if you know me you know that I do have the power to manifest anything I put my mind too — even accidently. I use words, thoughts, and actions to change my frequency. Have you ever tried to change yours?

 

David Bowie and Blackstar Lyrics

I have been listening to David Bowie’s last album everyday since my girlfriend bought it. Many people know that I am a student of religion and philosophy. So, even before he passed on from this life to the next, I heard some words in this songs that made me think about Christianity.  The title song itself “Blackstar” caused me to think he was writing about religion because the Devil is refered t as the Morning Star. I think by calling himself a Blackstar he was admitting that knew he was a sinner in need of salvation.

To be more specific, Blackstar seems to be a revelation (a conversation) between himself and his Spirit. Here are some lyrics that stuck out to me:

“In the villa of Orman.”

Orman is in Syria and Jesus did some inportant things in Syria. Did you know that Jesus appointed Peter as the first Pope while in Syria?  So, that solitary candle, could mean the beginning of the Church. Was David Bowie Catholic?  I don’t know. Maybe this is his way of saying he was.

“Something happened on the day he died
Spirit rose a metre and stepped aside
Somebody else took his place, and bravely cried”

The Bible says know that Jesus cried in The Garden of Gethsemene and that he took our place in Death. Christians believe that something did indeed happen on the day of execution. Salvation happened.

” On the day of execution, on the day of execution only women kneel and smile,”

Now this lyric brings to the foreground the woman who was at Jesus’ grave. There were no men gathered there. Only Mary Magdelene was present when he Jesus approached his own tomb. She was kneeling and weeping.  But imagine the “smile” she would have had on her face when she realized it was in fact Jesus that she was talking to in John 20:16-18

These few lines from Blackstar make me smile, just as Mary must have smiled. Because as a Christian, I want to believe that David Bowie, is a brother in Christ and  will be singing in God almighty Choir when I get there myself.

More lyrics from “Blackstar.”

Something happened on the day he died
Spirit rose a metre and stepped aside
Somebody else took his place,

How many times does an angel fall?
How many people lie instead of talking tall?
He trod on sacred ground, he cried loud into the crowd

I can’t answer why
Just go with me
I’m-a take you home
Take your passport and shoes
And your sedatives, boo
You’re a flash in the pan
I’m the Great I Am

I can’t answer why
But I can tell you how
We were born upside-down

Born the wrong way ‘round

Thank you for reading. I know religion is a hard subject to read about, expecially if it is somepne else’s explanations that they have cobbled together on their own. I realize I am only a person and I havven’t an answers, only curiosity. We will all miss David Bowie and I like to imagine him in heaven working with all those voices to create a joyful noise.

Little Cactus

Little Cactus

In a crumbling fence
Among these lost ruins
The little plant lives

The sand is so timeless
Where it waits for a drink
Sun comes up, night draws on
and it never shrinks

Only millimeters high
So strong and so stout
It survives it’s long life
On little of nothing… wholly without

The Librarian

The Librarian

by Thadd Presley

I went to the library today looking for a new book to begin reading and I came across a book by Johnathan Kellerman titled “True Detectives.”  I haven’t began reading it yet, but I’m hoping it will be a great book because he has many books and I’d like to find a new author to really sink my reading brain into. I feel like I’ve been writing so much lately that I have forgotten what it’s like to have a really good book to read.

With all that in my head, I came home and saw this meme on my facebook wall.

librarians

I thought about it for a while and it occurred to me that Librarians are not really generals at all. They are more priest-like and the head of a long and important line of The Illuminated. And being just that, Librarians have trained long and hard to reach their position. Yet, in modern times, many of the people who use the library don’t realize that the man or woman behind the desk who stamps the date in the back of the book, actually spent many years in college learning what is known as Library Science and many of our local librarians have earned the title of Library Science Masters.

Yes, there is prestige in being the librarian. There is honor and history and science behind these humble people of knowledge and we have not been taught to give them the respect they deserve. We are being systematically desensitized to the amazing achievement which is the library.

The Library

The first libraries existed over 8000 years ago! The Mesopotamians wrote on their history and ideas on clay tablets to preserve the knowledge they wanted to pass onto the world that followed. Thousands of these clay tablets have been discovered in the palaces and temples where they were stored and arranged long ago. These palaces and temples were the first real libraries.

The Egyptians wrote their knowledge on papyrus scrolls, which they also stored in palaces and temples. The most famous library in history was in Alexandria, built around 300 BC. It held nearly 700,000 scrolls.

The Romans planned the first system of public libraries and by the year 4 AD, wealthy citizens has began to build their own libraries. Suddenly, there was 28 libraries in Rome.

When the Christian Era began, libraries became part of the churches and monasteries. Monks read and copied books, so in that time many of the libraries were due to their hard work.

By the year 1400 the University of Oxford began to organize it’s library.  It is still the largest University library in the world.

In 1850 the English Parliament created our current library system and it has grown into the institution that it is today.

Every word of knowledge, every definition, and fact ever known has been written in a book, so that future generations, and the current one as well, can find the knowledge they want to know.

And now, the internet has been invented, but without the words having first been gathered and arranged in books it would have been forgotten long before the internet age. It was these books and these people who made libraries possible that has shaped and re-shaped our world.

The librarian is not just the person who tells you that your book is over due. The librarian is the priest, the palace guard, the university head, and a monk all in one, because it is the librarian who holds the key to all the words, knowledge, and traditions the world has ever known.

I Love Numbers

I have always loved numbers. I love science and equations and nature. I want to know if math is a natural phenomenon ( a natural product of nature) which we have just began to figure out (like we are trying to figure out gravity) or is math a language that we have invented to understand things like gravity and counting?

I love words as well, but I know that words are just part of a universal language which we invented to describe the natural phenomenon we call thoughts. We think it and we use words to describe it. But math is there and can’t be explained any easier than it already presents itself.  1+1=2 and that is that.  Sure I can make it harder, but that’s not the point of math. Where at times words are better when they are drawn out and made a bit wordier with description and unimportant details, but math is not like that. Numbers can not be added on and drawn out to make an equation better. Extra numbers are quickly crossed out and ignored.

Math often comes in the form of unknowns. Such as F = (G x (M1 x M2/r))  and for a long time G was unknown and still could change due to existence of gravitational waves.

So, I love math and I love words and more than anything I would love to win the lottery tonight since it is upto 1.5 billion dollars.  Could you imagine 1,500,000 thousand dollar bills? I can’t.  But look at the numbers below.   It is only a thought experiment, but is it possible?

The Lottery and the numbers there in:

Everyone has a 1 in 293,000,000 chance to win the jackpot. So why doesn’t a rich someone buy 293 million tickets at 2 bucks a pop and spend around 586 million to win every single prize offered.  Even after taxes and everything taken out they would still make a profit.

Now, a gloomier side of math. Here are just a few numbers about the U.S.A and it’s national debt:

I here about the National Debt all the time these days. Either from Donald J. Trump or from my friends and family. I know the debt is 18 trillion dollars, but that is only a small percent of what the US really owes.

Here is what the government owes to the American People, since it has spent the money the accounts paid into by Americans: Social Security is owed 14 trillion, 27 trillion to the Medicare Liability Fund, and 100 trillion to other unfunded liabilities.

There is also another 5 trillion on top of the 18 trillion owed externally that is not talked about openly.

In total the government owes far, far more to the American people than it does to external entities.

To put everything in perspective, the national taxe revenue is 3.3 trillion a year plus 1.6 trillion from the state level, while congress has agreed to spend 3.7 trillion each year for 2016 and 2017, which adds up to 5.4 trillion more in debt.

Other numbers show a worse picture – median pay in 2000 was 28,135  and in 2015 it was 29,035.  median home cost in 2000 was 165,000 while in 2015 it rose to 293,000 dollars.

pay checks went up less than a thousand dollars in 15 years, but home prices went up over 100,000 dollars?

unemployed is officially 7,800,000, but the actual number is 15 million. (this is the numbers washington has)  — and 92 million people are not in the work force at all.

anyway, I’ve been thinking about numbers all day because of the lottery.

if everyone has a 1 in 293 million chance to win, than Donald Trump could buy 293 million tickets at 2 bucks and spend 586 million and win every single prize offered.

A Writer

Writers

They write
They type,
They’ll edit many times

Move words
’til they’ve
perfected every line

A writer
A lover
of words and page

Writers
aren’t born
somehow their made.


I’ve was a writer even before I realized what being one meant. It was more a nagging suspicion than a revelation. There was always something inside of me trying to get free. My first experience of wanting to create a story was after reading a Conan the Barbarian book. I saw the map inside and drew my own. I tried to write a story to go along with the map, but I never got around to it. I was in seventh grade at that time.  I didn’t actually write any stories that year, but I could see the characters on the map and I began to hear character’s voices in my head. I knew where they lived, where they were going, and what they had to do.  Although, these characters and plots have been with me for a long time, I have failed to write every story,  but I’ve finished plenty along the way. I truly feel that writing is something that chose me.

Old Man’s Last Say

I used to write poetry everyday.  Many of the poems are collected in my book “Poetry Principia,” which I wrote as a way to teach myself new styles of poetry.  You can download the book from Amazon for 99 cents. You can find many of my poems in this blog, but I invite you to take a chance and buy the book.

http://www.amazon.com/Poetry-Principia-Thadd-Presley-ebook/dp/B007X4UGZA

The Old Man’s Last Say

by Thadd Presley

“The worms can have him, for from them he was made,”
the lady remarked as she looked on the grave
and chopped at the dirt with a long handled spade.

She had buried her husband late in the day.
“The sun is too hot, we’ll wait for the shade.
I know he will rot, but he’ll not do it today.”

He was put away quickly, with no friends there to pray,
And when it was over, I remember no-one had stayed.
“Now that he’s gone, I’ll can get married this spring
with all of his money, we can buy the best things.”

But, that wasn’t the end of what that man had to say.
The ground suddenly shook all around the grave.
A great voice rose up and declared from the clay.

“You might have succeeded in ending my days
but you’ll never outlive your hate and disgrace.
I curse you this day ’til the last breath you take
A widow you are and a widow you’ll stay,”

To a cold, whining wind, his voice then gave way
and the widow never married and wasn’t seen since that day.
I come to this hill and stand near their graves.
I remember what mother told me on her final day.

Years later, in tears, she weakly proclaimed:
“I killed your father. It was my greatest mistake.
But love will always conquer a heart filled with hate.”

P.S.
Thank you for reading. I wish you all a Happy New Year 2016.

The Hunger (to read)

In my last post, I wrote a Letter to Santa Claus and revealed that I love to read. It’s true that I haven’t found many new books that catch my interest lately. Perhaps, I’m getting to picky. I read everyday and write everyday.

One writer that I used to read is Bentley Little. He has a knack of writing stories that really stick in my head and I find myself cringing years later when remembering a short story or a certain line. He is a talent, no doubt.  Few other writers have made me have this reaction.

Stephen King is a true writer. He has dedicated his life to turning out novel after novel, but nothing he has ever written has stuck with me for too long.  Don’t think I haven’t read all of his books and have been thinking of reading them again. There are a few I would enjoy very much.

Another writer I absolutely was fated to find and read was Isaac Asimov. The Foundation Trilogy, the Earth books, and the Robot Series are amazing and I wouldn’t be who I am today without having discovered them.

 

 

I am leaving you with a poem titled Hunger.  Enjoy.

 

Hunger

by Thadd Presley

The last sunrise brought tears about
just as blood brings years to me now.
Put behind me my crimes,
Too long, I’ve hid  from man’s eyes
long was the distance, long was the time
’til a love returned that I enjoyed in my life
It came back to me, screaming
calling, in desperate cries

Suddenly, I needed to share it still;
to find those with thoughts and those who feel,
to tell my story and allow a clear reveal
of my obsessions and of my will
by professing my great love for words; Oh, how it will feel!!

After countless ideas, my stories have piled high
and I yearn to have but one glancing eye
to cross my pages and take into mind
the story I’ve tried my entire life to write.

I can’t do this!!
Yes, I know.

But, if I words plant my words?
What would grow?
Is it right to sow that which I don’t know?
Grow in people a cancerous growth?
Make another hunger for the page, a wretched bleak fate
Begin them toward a wretched, bleak fate
with nightmares and visions, in sleeping and wake
to which there’s no end and no way to escape.

To know what’s in me will come out,
to know every whisper escapes as a shout!!
and knowing brings me to a cold shutter,
that we’ll be judged for ever word that we utter.

It’s not what goes in my mind, but what comes out
that shows what my words could possibly sprout
and reveals myself, both inside and out
made known, everywhere and throughout.

That’s what we breath
That’s what we see
That’s what we eat
When we hunger to read.

 

 

Thank you for reading. Also, if you have a blog I will be more than happy to add it on my “other blogs” page.

Thadd Presley’s Christmas Wish List

Dear Santa, as you know, I’m a big reader. I even love it more than writing. Recently, I was thinking about buying a book because I didn’t have anything new to read and I wanted a short story collection so bad, but after looking in all the stores in Oak Ridge and Knoxville, I couldn’t find one that I really wanted. So, I started wondering how many writers were out there that nobody knew existed. I knew there was one at least that is unknown and wondering: is there anybody out, is there anybody out there who could write the greatest short story collection ever, if they only decided to write one?

And the answer came to me faster than one of your magical reindeer fly. The answer was, of course, the great and powerful Roger Water, who’s words are forever sang and revered.

I know that if he wrote a short story collection it would set records that would take years to break. Much like the words in the albums he is known to occasionally write, this book would become a record setting machine and would set a record that would never be broken. Like the album “Dark Side of the Moon,” which stayed in the charts for 741 weeks from 1973 to 1988 and selling 50 million albums worldwide., this book of fiction would become a testament of legend.

So, I’m sure, Santa,  that you’ve heard “The Dark Side of the Moon” and “The Wall” which I’m citing as major examples of the skill and power Mr. Roger Waters is capable of putting into his words.  And since he is such a gift to the literary world it’s not like I’m asking for this gift out of selfishness. No, I’m writing this for the world. It will be a gift to humanity itself.

So please, Santa, please make Mr. Waters write a book of fiction. I want to read it so bad and I’ve been good all year. Well, you know I was good for some of it.  Please Santa, this is my only Christmas wish and I promise to be better next year if I can have this one, single thing.  Thank you Santa for all you’ve done for all the other children around the world. I love you so much.

P.S.

And also, Santa will you make him name it “Diving Deep?”  I think “Diving Deep” would be a good title for Roger Waters to use when he writes it.

And P.S. again,

Santa will you please become a racecar driver? You would win every time.

Signed, Thadd Presley