Love is Over-Rated

I said that Love is over-rated and I meant it. At least, the shallow, weak emotions society sees as Love .  And I’ll go even further and say most people don’t know what Love truly is.  I wonder: Do I even know?

Honestly, I don’t know if I know. That’s just the nature of not knowing. But, I know what Love is not and that gives me an idea of what Love feels like.

Love is not dependence.

“We need to help people to discover the true meaning of love. Love is generally confused with dependence. Those of us who have grown in true love know that we can love only in proportion to our capacity for independence.” — From The World According To Mister Rogers

Love is not something that goes away with time.

The more we love, the more we want to love and it begins with love for ourselves.

Love is infinite and all powerful.

Love can see beyond the facade people portray as themselves. It is a mirror that reflects the real you back perfectly and allows you to see the parts of yourself that is blocking your desires. Love does not lie to you and allow you to remain stagnant.

There is a literary device used in many stories to show a character’s growth throughout life and the many ways they change, but throughout the many obstacles and events, their dreams never change nor does their core essence. This device is called Bildungsroman. I think this is one word that can help describe one of Love’s attributes.

I believe societies Love is become the direct opposite of Bildungsroman because true Love would never turn you away from something you desire. It would never stand in your way or hold you back from reaching your goals.

Love pulls you forward. Whether it’s the Love of someone else or your own, it will direct you in a positive way. Love does not have a negative connotation. It draws you in.

 

It is not the thought that matters, but the action. Love perfects you, it does not tear you down. Love expands your horizons, it does not tie you down. Love is a fire that burns away the lies and stupidity and tempers the truth. Love wakes you up and shakes off the contentment and satisfaction you thought was good enough.

Many may say it, many may think it, many may want it, but few actually do it.

“You think because he doesn’t love you that you are worthless. You think that because he doesn’t want you anymore that he is right — that his judgement and opinion of you are correct. If he throws you out, then you are garbage. You think he belongs to you because you want to belong to him. Don’t. It’s a bad word, ‘belong.’ Especially when you put it with somebody you love. Love shouldn’t be like that. Did you ever see the way the clouds love a mountain? They circle all around it; sometimes you can’t even see the mountain for the clouds. But you know what? You go up top and what do you see? His head. The clouds never cover the head. His head pokes through, because the clouds let him; they don’t wrap him up. They let him keep his head up high, free, with nothing to hide him or bind him. You can’t own a human being. You can’t lose what you don’t own. Suppose you did own him. Could you really love somebody who was absolutely nobody without you? You really want somebody like that? Somebody who falls apart when you walk out the door? You don’t, do you? And neither does he. You’re turning over your whole life to him. Your whole life, girl. And if it means so little to you that you can just give it away, hand it to him, then why should it mean any more to him? He can’t value you more than you value yourself.” ―Toni Morrison

“I do not trust people who don’t love themselves and yet tell me, ‘I love you.’ There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.” ―Maya Angelou

“Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.” ―Deborah Reber

 

The Perfect Day

 

Sometimes, someone has a bad day. No, that’s not right at all.  Everyone of us have bad days. But, we find numerous ways to deal with it. Each of us something different. There are those who find clever ways to ignore the bad happening. These people can be said to only see the good things that happen. Then, there are those who have a habit of dwelling on the bad happening and allow it to affect the rest of the day. These two approaches are pretty much the limit of dealing with a bad day.

But, there are a growing number of people who recreate the bad day over and over again. Examples of this are: couples who argue over the same issues every morning, employees who take the same route to work and find themselves upset, rude and flustered, many who repeat the same day expecting a different tomorrow.

The fear of Scarcity and Victimization makes up 99% of human thinking. The idea that there is not enough keep most of us from taking chances. Everything that happened yesterday becomes an excuse of why today is the way it is, why someone is the way they are, why someone does not have what they want to have.

There are so many creative people in the world, I can fairly say that one is reading this now. Are you a creative person? Do you have a creative soul? Do you want to change your life? I have an idea that might make a difference in your day. First, let’s think about your day and how you want it to start and end.

Then, plan your perfect day.

Write it hour by hour like a film script. Be as detailed as you want to be. Who are the characters? What is the goal of the play (the day)?  Since you are the protagonist, who or what is the antagonist? Be specific and really look at your day as if you have control over how it is going to play out.

This is one thing that needs to be done because at some point you have to take responsibility for the day you create. You are the reason your day is the way it is. You created it with your mind, with your actions, and with your fear based intention.

Write your perfect day and begin to make it a reality. Do not write it from scarcity or fear. But, instead, write the day as if there is no bounds, nothing off limits, and you can be exactly the person you are.

Thanks for reading and have a great day.

 

Creative People And their Muse

Breaking down poetic boundaries and looking inside

 

Have you ever met someone very interesting and wanted to get to know them?

If you have, and most of us have, you will better understand what it feels like for a writer to have a new idea. The ideas do not appear as words interacting with other words. The characters are people, who live in towns and cities, and have lives and hopes and dreams of their own. Connections are built between the characters that lead to dynamic interactions and have lasting consequences for the story.

While writing the story, feelings develop for the characters because the writer knows how they feel. It’s with these emotions, the ones that exist in the writer’s mind that create characters so real and interesting, that the reader becomes involved and develops emotional attachment.

Ideas sometimes grow into forbidden orchards and conversations sometimes bloom into beautiful gardens.

It might seem strange to you that a writer creates a killer who carries a knife with a short, dull blade because he likes to watch the light’s in his victims eyes flicker out right after they die. And how about the writer who talks about a character as if the person is really alive? It might seem strange when a writer models a victim or love interest after someone they know in real life. But, writing is a very strange thing indeed. It’s strange to have people talking in your head, strange to imagine murdering someone and how to get away with it. Writing is strange in a million ways.

Time and time again, creative people collect poison water from a shallow spring and carefully filter it until it is clear and sparkling.

Writers enjoy creating people and stories. It’s part of their lives. The Muse gives her stories and takes them away. Life is good when the Muse dances. Life is miserable when she hides herself away. It becomes like a drug. It’s their way of life. The Muse is an important part of any creative person’s mental and emotional support group.

 

So the next time the creative person in your life is talking about their story as if it is real or you recognize features of a character in the checkout line at the neighborhood grocery store, just be happy that the creative person is being creative.

How To Get Everything You Want

1. Know what you want!

People say: this is easier said than done. But it’s done by many people and it’s the most important step to the getting everything you want.

2. Know what you don’t want.

Obviously, we know what we don’t want. So, this comes down to finding the courage to rid yourself of it. Carlos Castenada said, “You either make yourself miserable or you make yourself strong, the amount of work is the same.”

3. Focus on what you want.

Take a moment, everyday, for Meditation and visualize yourself doing the thing you want. The more you do this the closer you come to having it.

4. Work toward your goal everyday in a structured manner.

Set an uninterrupted time to work toward your goal. Don’t take phone calls, tell your housemates to not bother you, and let everyone know this is not a request.  If they interrupted, you must start over. Yes, this will become the most important part of your day and everyone must respect it. Because let’s face it, if you’re continuously interrupted while working you are not in an atmosphere conductive to achieving your goals.

5. Evaluate your wants and don’t wants.

If you don’t have what you want, you don’t want it enough. Either that, or you must admit that you have exactly what you want. Wayne Dyer said, “You don’t get what you want. You get what you are.”

6. Believe in Yourself!

You are making this happen. All the good things, all the bad things, everything in your life is because you willed it into being. So, take Responsibility.